As a Troubled Teen | Ugliness Became My Teacher – Part 2

Posted on June 2, 2011 by Craig Rogers
Part of a series of reliefs spotted in Bishops...

As a Troubled Teen | Ugliness Became My Teacher – Part 2

by Craig Rogers, co-founder of Abundant Life Academy

As a troubled teen Ugliness was my teacher, mentor, and coach.  I followed Ugly until I was completely destroyed.  Blinded by ugly, I hated those who loved me, resented those who attempted to hep me, and railed against those who opposed my self-destruction.  I had become comfortable an addicted to “victim hood” and gained my peace through hating those who I had victimized with my hate…. all things Ugliness gave me as my teacher.

“…The agony that I had wallowed in was thick, entrapping myself, my feelings, and my hope… in a big mucky merky goo.  There was no escape, no hope, and no relief…”

The things that went on inside my head were far different from the reality around me.  There were moments in time that I realized that my version of events, my belief about people, and my twisted perception did not line up with reality.  But most of the time I was clouded from the truth.  This blindness was convenient and gave me a sense of false relief.  As long as I had convinced myself that I was the victim, any perception or twist of the facts was reasonable and justified.  The moments of “true reality” were painful, therefore I would “play the game” and change the facts (in my mind) in order to seek the relief I needed.  Unfortunately, I was left exhausted, and full of anxiety.  I didn’t trust those who I was supposed to trust, and I rejected those who could bring full relief.  At the same time I colluded with those I should not trust, the people who would support my selfish view points, and encourage me to rebel against those who could help me.  Ugliness was my teacher, coach, and mentor… I followed whatever he said with reckless abandon.

When I discovered drugs and alcohol and how they could bring forth tremendous relief, and even help me to experience some “good feelings” about myself and my life, I could never get enough.  Right from the start I abused drugs and alcohol.  It was a relief through self-medication, something that I could control and use with tremendous security that I “deserved” it.  Meanwhile, the mentality I had toward authority or anyone who was “righteous” (loving, caring, giving, supportive) got more of my wrath than ever before.  Drugs and alcohol gave me boldness, and in that boldness I became outspoken, attacking those who stood by me.  I was the spoke person or mouth piece of “Ugly”.  Taking Ugly’s lead, following his teaching, and practicing the vile that he spewed upon me, I in turn did the same to others.  Ugly hated those who were truthful, those who had another answer (besides hate and bitterness).  My recollection of reality was so twisted that I attacked the very people who gave me “the way out”.  My rejection of their help was followed by a rejection of them, personally.  Later I found out how many people I had hurt.  Later I found out how ridiculous I sounded, and how far out of touch I had become.  Many people pitied me and I had no idea.

I was sincerely convinced that the reality of my life prism was reflecting accurately the events of my life, and those who were responsible – I was the victim according to Ulgy, my teacher and mentor.  Ugly had convinced me that my problems were caused by those who attempted to help me.  I hated anyone who was involved in any attempt to help me.  Ugly had twisted the truth, and I listened, followed, and carried out his hatefulness (you can always hear “Ugly” in people when they hold grudges, speak about vengeance, and hold people down with bitterness – even if someone did harm me, or treat me poorly, for my own sake I must forgive them, love them, and serve them – returning their hurt with love… or, I am the victim, and become ugly by holding on to the resentment, letting turn into bitterness, and then spewing vile all over myself and others as I refuse to let go of the past and move on with love).

When I came to my sense at 27 years old, there is no way to describe the crushing weight of the REALITY of what I had done to myself, and to those who had loved me.  There was no way to make up for what I had done, and I couldn’t go back and erase it.  The only option I had to make up for all those I had hurt, and the way in which I could “give back” to so many good and faithful people that suffered from my wrath, was to go out and serve others (families and teens) for the rest of my life.  When I began to forgive others, forgie myself, and made amends toward those I had harmed Ugly left me… he vanished… But he didn’t go without some spitting, kicking, and biting.  But ultimately, what I found by loving those who had harmed me was that they were no different than I.  I found that they had fears, regrets, and flaws.  I found out that none of us are righteous, no one is perfect, and if it were not for the grace of God I would be dead and gone.  Therefore, I aligned myself with the Spirit of Truth and let go of the Spirit of Performance (judgement – looking at the flaws and faults of others while ignoring my own, as if I was perfect…). The only way that I could honor all those people that I had harmed, was to go into the world and sacrifice myself to serve those who were like me, to take on their abuse, but to never give up… be there when they wake up to their reality of self-destruction, help them to let go of victim hood, and to actually taste the beauty and serenity of peace.  I was obligated and I have faithfully served for the last 23 years.  I have absolutely no regrets other than I wished that I had two life times to overcome the damage I had inflicted upon those who stood by me, coached me, and loved me through some tough times.

The day I stopped allowing ugliness to be my teacher, and turned to the Spirit of God, to love and to serve others selflessly, and to forgive those who I thought had harmed me, and to let go of all bitterness, to let go of wrath and malice, and to cling to and hold on tightly to the Spirit of Grace, is the day that I received the total serenity I had always sought.  I was free… gone was the oppression, the darkness, the pain and the agony. In its place was hope, faith, and love… Ugliness was my destroyer, and he almost got me.  Now, to go on from here my job is clear, to bring about the awareness of ugly and to show y0ung people that Ugliness is not a good teacher, he sucks at mentorship, and he has nothing to offer but agony, depression, and despair.  The truth and freed that we seek is in Christ alone!

The hideous thing about Ugliness is that the person who is being spewed upon is not the one being hurt.  The spewer is blinded to his or her own entrapment, and they have no idea that the hate and the personal attacks they launch upon others in vengeance and bitterness is really upon them.  The infection and the puss from the hatred inside is causing the pain, and the anguish is proof of this.  Forgiveness is not necessarily for those who hurt us, but for us and our peace.  Meaning, when we forgive those who hurt us then we are set free.  The truth is that some people did hurt me, and they let me down, and they were not there when I needed them the most.  Even if these events happened decades ago they can continue to hurt me because I refused to let go and forgive.  If I did forgive, I am set free, no longer in a position to be harmed by the person who let me down.  Moreover, the next major truth to forgiveness is even more important…. I have let people down, I have betrayed those I love, and I have harmed others in ways that I will always regret.  I don’t know any human who ever lived that didn’t hurt someone they love, or let down someone who counted on them.  To judge others for what I have done is hypocritical, and nasty, causing an infection deep down inside of me to fester.  The Bible tells us to forgive 7 times 70, and their is a real good reason for it.

My hope and prayer for troubled teens is to open their eyes to see “ugly”.  If they are allowing ugly to be their teacher, then they are allowing the peace and comfort they seek to get further and further away.  More over, the pain and agony they believed came upon them at the hand of another, is really causing self-imposed injury.  The vile and venom of hate that comes from Ugly is meant to destroy, to steal joy, and to terrify those who love us.  Forgiveness, and the freedom that comes from forgiving ourselves and others, replaces the anguish and vile with peace and empathy.  Forgiveness is the road paved with love and understanding, giving us a compass of wisdom and therefore a clear path to fulfill our destiny, to complete our noble cause, and to make our lives count.  Listen to ugly, or listen to the Spirit of Mercy and Grace.  It is a choice that we all have to make.  Do well with your choice!

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As a Troubled Teen | Ugliness Became My Teacher

Posted on May 30, 2011 by Craig Rogers
DarkmatterHC

As a troubled teen ugliness became my new teacher

By Craig Rogers – Parent Coach

The following story is just that, a story of a troubled teen, my story. It is an allegory that is not factual as it pertains to actual events, incidents, or timelines. But it is very true nonetheless. The format of this story is meant to bring attention to a place that many just don’t understand.  As a struggling teen my parents certainly did not understand.  This  is attempts to describe the feelings I dealt with as a troubled teen and as a young adult; feelings of isolation, loneliness, and abandonment.  I was misunderstood, and there is no doubt about that.  Throughout my struggle I blamed everyone, including myself.  The truth is that I struggled greatly to connect with others.  I couldn’t explain what was going on, and my emotional literacy was underdeveloped.  Years later I found a way to describe what I had experienced.  By that time there was a lot of self-imposed damage, and many relationships were destroyed.

Although many of the “feelings” and “emotions” described in this story are real, the events are not.  I purposely did not go into “detail of actual events”, nor did I attempt to describe an accurate timeline of events.  The purpose of this story is to help others to understand the depth of the despair that some kids go through, even if their pain is self-imposed.  The depth of the loneliness and anguish I experienced caused great confusion, and I didn’t know who to trust and who to follow.  Mostly, I turned against those who attempted to care for me, coach me, or to pull me out of the pit. Although most of my pain was brought about by my continued poor personal choices, I didn’t experience any improvement until I began to take full responsibility of me. It really didn’t matter if I was a victim (hurt by another) or that I had caused my own demise despite the attempts of others to save me from myself.  It NEVER matters.  In the end if you (anyone) wants true freedom, to live a full life of freedom, you must first begin to take full responsibility of your choices (they are truly your choices) and to hold yourself accountable.

You can spot a person (young or old) that is still “caught up” into victim hood. They stand out like a sore thumb and they have similar thinking and typical behaviors. They are easy to spot and its simple to identify their obvious patterns.  As they describe themselves they describe being “helpless”.  They describe events as if these negative events are “happening to them”.  Almost as if they are totally set apart from the negative situation, having no responsibility, victimized.  Moreover, you find the same mentality in jail, prisons, and other institutions (reoccurring mental health treatment) where a person fails to grow up and be accountable. If you look closely the victims are not responsible in any way, blind to the obvious reoccurring patterns of dysfunction thinking.  But what is really weird is the fact that true victims (people who were truly victimized) are still responsible to over come their wounds, or they will continue to be paralyzed and trapped.  As a matter of fact the most successful people in the world are people who were true victims but overcame the unfortunate events by turning them into strengths (having rich relationships based empathy and forgiveness, understanding and mercy).

Therefore, this story is written for those who don’t understand why some people (teens and adults) get stuck and they strike out in blame for what has happened to them in their journey through life.  This story is not for the one who is stuck in victim hood.  They won’t hear it, and they are blinded to the fact that they are trapped in a self-imposed prison of helplessness and anger.  The absurdity of their blame shifting can not be comprehended, and therefore I suggest that you don’t try.  It is senseless to try to convince them to that they are responsible.  Even if you showed the video tapes of their actions that led them to their demise they will not admit that they are responsible.  They twist reality to fit their schematic of victim hood.  Stuck troubled teens grow up to be adults who are “victims of self”; the self-inflicted wounded are hostile, angry, vile, and they seek vengeance. They are on the constant mission to identify the culprit when the truth is that they are the responsible party.

The blinded victims of self are really convinced that they have been victimized.  For example, there are a few former students of Abundant Life Academy who blame us (myself and ALA) for what happened to them before they were enrolled, prior to meeting us, and there is nothing we can say to change their illusion.  For example, Andrea Johnson, the young lady who is the biggest critic of ALA (a student for 51 days) puts all of her problems on ALA.  She doesn’t include the continual involvement with mental health hospitals in the years leading up to her short stay at ALA. She doesn’t mention that her mother withheld this information from us. Andrea does not say a single word about all the outrageous behavior she displayed prior to coming to ALA.  She does not mention that she had been in and out of the emergency placements (mental hospitals).  We didn’t have a single thing to do with those incidents and did not know of them until after she departed from ALA.  Upon her arrival it became very obvious that something was wrong.  It didn’t take long before we took her to a mental hospital after she attempted suicide.  As Andrea describes the events ALA is the singular cause and these events happened to her because of her stay at ALA.  I am hard pressed to find a way to take responsibility for events over the years prior to coming to ALA.  But she is convinced that it is our fault.

Literally, victims blame others as if they were actually present causing the misfortunate circumstances to occur.  As they look back at the circumstances that led to their enrollment into Abundant Life Academy, the victim-type students will not include themselves in the stories.  They don’t describe themselves or their actions.  They tell the story as if cruel people conspired against them and sent them away for no reason at all.  They go to great lengths to blame shift and lump a whole bunch of people into being the culprit, justifying there position of victim.  But if you listen to their stories of victim hood you will discover one very odd thing.  They describe events that make you wonder if they were even there.  It is almost as if they were not there, because they don’t take any accountability for the situation.  “My parents sent me away for no good reason, rejecting me, and abandoning me!”  What they don’t mention and will not admit is that they had dropped out of school, were extremely disruptive at home, defiant, sneaking out, using drugs, and all kinds of other things (not all students of ALA fit this description, but the “victim” types that blame their situation on everyone else seem to fit this description more often”).

The truth is that I was one of these victims.  I can be very bold and descriptive because I was one of these victims who were not responsible for the acts that led to my demise.  I refused to take responsibility, would not allow any accountability, and I had become an expert in justification and blame shifting.  I can’t go back and remember being the victim, but I can describe to you the feelings and emotions of being trapped.  I was truly convinced that all the problems in my life were “happening to me” and that life was unfair, and that I had nothing to do with the detrimental outcome that I continually faced.  I was convinced that my problems were my parents fault.  I was convinced that many others (most those who tried to help me) failed me, causing my problems to exist.  Unfortunately I didn’t wake up to the hideous trap I was in until a great deal of destruction wreaked havoc in my life and the lives of others.  I spent years going back and making amends to everyone I had accused, blamed, and railed against – spewing ugly venom upon them, accusing them of causing my plight in life.  I had claimed for years that I had become a drug addict because my mom and dad beat me, abused me, and caused great damage.  The truth is that I was 100% responsible for all that I faced, and I was 100% responsible for getting out of the trap.  I had to kill the victim before it killed me.  What a wake up call I had.

I am able to help as many teens as I have because I know the trap, and I know what it feels like to be a self-imposed victim, trapped in a perception that keeps you in bondage.  I know the lie, and I know the unique circumstances that the victims face.  I know how to stand against it, and I will not give up on the victims even if they persecute me, attack me, and say all kinds of evil against me.  I know how horrible they will feel about all the ugliness they spew on others when they finally wake up from the comma, and begin to see what they have done to themselves despite the help form others.  If it were not for those who refused to give up on me I would not be here.  I would be dead, or in prison.  Therefore, I will take the abuse from the victims because I am grateful for those who did not give up on me.  I will continue to fight the good fight with the hope that God will open their eyes to the horrid trap of lies.  I will continue to fight for them until they are able to open their eyes and be set free.

My Story of Ugliness – by Craig Rogers

I hope that I never forget the years of being a “troubled teen”, and I will always be grateful for the fact that “ugliness” became my new teacher. For many years, I, Craig Stephen Rogers, would have done almost anything to blot out the horrible memories of my late teens and early twenties. I still cringe and become somewhat nauseous when I think back; becoming anxious I hustle internally to stop the thoughts (memories) from fully deploying in the projector room of my mind. My mentor, teacher, and Life Coach was pure evil, training me to hate, equipping me to viciously attack those who loved me, and to isolate me from anyone in my life that could help lead me out of the pit; the darkness where I had become a prisoner, a slave, a drone who’s only purpose was to represent evil – hating everything that was pure and righteous – intolerant and filled with vile and rage toward the love of God… Jesus… I was a slave to the one I later named “ugliness”.

Not all of my memories of that era of my life are bad…. Because when I drank or used drugs I experienced great relief. The problem is that I had to stay intoxicated every night, and over time I had to drink and use more and more to stave off the night terrors. Over time I used heavily just to “get normal”, and to live in peace. But I knew it was only a matter of time before he caught up with me… and I promised myself that when that day came I would end it all.

The specific memories that frightened me, causing near-panic attacks, are the memories of my teacher, mentor, and life coach – Ugliness. Ugliness was dark, hideous, callous, and filled with pure evil. When I was in his grasp I felt trapped, pinned down, and ugly – worthless, discounted, and dismissed. Ugly would beat me and tell me to believe that I was unloved, unimportant, and a complete disappointment. He never let up or stopped for a break. He would only change the way in which he tortured me. Ugly promised me that I could end it all if I would just denounce myself, admit that I was scum, born to let others down, and just plain stupid. He was judge, jury, and executioner. I was slowly, over time, losing the will to resist Ugly until one day I stopped fighting. I was convinced that ending my life was the only way out of this nightmare. After 10 years, at 27 years old, I gave up and gave in. For the next year I planned, plotted, and attempted to take my own life. Ugly was most hideous and evil as he mocked me as the failure who failed at suicide. What a loser I had become.

I had been given a crown and it was placed on my head in complete disdain and mockery; a Sceptor was tied to my hand… I was propped up on a throne of vile and hatred – hissing and cursing – laughter and cries of horror. Being hailed as the “the son of ugly”, the laughter and mockery echoed in the pit, hanging up in the thick fog… sounding out in an evil way that led me to believe that I was trapped forever with Ugly – adopted into the family of darkness, an heir to the throne of death. I had become like Ugly, molded into his likeness… completed the metamorphose (training) to become Ugliness – I was he and he was me… So I thought.

When ever I was conscious I desperately clawed and thrashed about, attempting to break free from the cold heavy chains. I was in bondage to be tormented. Ugliness was beating me, terrorizing me, and getting me ready to be let lose into a small circular pit of blood. I was being trained for war, trained to devour and wreak mayhem. Like the evil men who beat their fighting dogs (Put Bulls) hoping to create the most nasty and vicious killer dog, trained up to be so filled with rage and hate they would fight to the death… even if it were their own death – it didn’t matter, we had been beaten down until we were drunk with the power to kill, steal, and destroy.

These memories give me chills and the heebee-geebees and I dislike them more than anyone will know. The training process with Ugly started innocently. In the beginning ugly wasn’t ugly at all. He seemed to be the only one who truly appreciated me, the only one that didn’t have unrealistic expectations of me, and never seemed to be let down or disappointed when I failed to measure up. But slowly, over time, ugly went from “safe” and “trusted” to “controlling” and “judgmental”. Ugly had slowly, without my notice, transformed into the Spirit of Performance. He was become mean, and angry when I didn’t meet the expectations of others. He began to whisper mean statements, like “are you stupid?”. “How could you be so dumb?” The name calling and ridicule came only when I had failed, but it was worse each time. Ugly hated it when I failed and it was as if he took it personally, as if he was the one that looked bad when I failed. He began to beat me.

I began to hate anything, anyone, and any place that would cause me to fail, look bad, or to bring upon me the wrath of Ugly. I stopped doing anything that could make me look stupid, and I used lies and deceit to cover up the fear I had of Ugly. When I would fail at school, or sports, or even a game of cards Ugly began to manifest within me. He was no longer just “inside my thoughts”. He began to go through me, out of my mouth, and assault anyone that made him look stupid. He began to take me over completely, as if I had no control, possessed by Ugly, convinced that everyone wad out to get “us”. I felt empathy and compassion for Ugly. I made excuses for him, justifying his hostility and rage. He was treated so unfairly, singled out, and while everyone else got away with things Ugly and I would be persecuted. Ugly and I understood each other. We were victims and we deserved better. We had every right to defend ourselves and to lash out against those that would find pure joy to see us fail. Committed to each other we began to look for others who were under the same kind of terror, assault, clamor and stupor. We would seek others, form a bond, protect ourselves from the righteous and eventually get enough backing from “like-minded victims” to start fighting back. Ugly and I became a dynamic duo. He would use my tongue and the strength and size of my body to literally kick some ass. We were drunk with vengeance and bitterness.

There was a moment on time way back then that I woke up from a stupor. As i was shaking off the wooziness I began to come to my senses. I was confused, dizzy, and unsure about everything that was flooding my eyes and ears. I was wondering in a thick fog, moving toward the light while realizing the loud clamor behind me was not friendly. I became frantic, confused, and began to panic. I couldn’t speak but wanted to scream out for help. I began to realize that I was trapped, oppressed at every turn, running fast but not getting amy where. There was evil all about, but the evil that was breathing upon the back of my neck seared my skin. The burning pain was so intense i passed out. When I woke up in a puddle of sweat I was relieved that it was just another one of those nightmares, the nightmare that haunted me, causing me to become fearful of falling asleep.

The best way to describe my nightmares is to use the term “Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.” I was never diagnosed with PTSD, mainly because I never shared my night terrors with anyone (except on particular college roommate who’s name is Mark). At that time I had no idea that the term PTSD even existed and it wasn’t fully known to me until years later. All I can say is that I was under assault (being chased by something I could not see) and I was in literal terror, running for my life, but not getting anywhere. I couldn’t see past my nose, and the stench was beyond imagination. I could hear and feel the breath of evil and knew that if I was caught I would be slaughtered.

Most of the time I could hear the hideous screams of others who were in deep agony, begging for death – hoping to end the attack. I never saw anyone else in my dreams but I could tell that the one torturing us all had no intentions of killing us… Not at least while he could continue to torture.  If he killed us he would be doing us a favor.

Part 2 coming soon

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Complaints About Abundant Life Academy

Posted on April 26, 2011 by Craig Rogers

Taking the Handoff | Abundant Life Academy Spo...

Complaints about Abundant Life Academy

by Craig Rogers

Abundant Life Academy receives its fair share of complaints. Trust me, before we every opened our doors… while we were still in the “vision stage”… we received complaints.  Abundant Life Academy is unique, but not so unique as to avoid complaints.  As a therapeutic boarding school for troubled teens Abundant Life Academy we are open to a great deal of complaints. We have always received complaints and we expect them to never end. Complaints about Abundant Life Academy organizations, entities, corporations, churches, sports teams, restaurants, businesses, and governments are like the stars in the sky at midnight. Everyone complains, and every one has an opinion which are usually presented in the form of a complaint.

Complaints about Abundant Life Academy are not unusual, and not taken lightly… we take it very seriously. But the truth is that not every complaint is registered, nor is every complaint against Abundant Life Academy a concern. My Dad used to say, “complaints (criticisms) are like #@*holes… everyone has one and they all stink!” My Dad was a perfectionist and did every thing in his life to please his own standard of excellence, regardless of what everyone else thought. He just did not care about others’ complaints. My Father taught me that if someone has a solution about a problem and has the “guts” to share it with you, then it is not a complaint and you have received the “gift that keeps giving”. First, he would describe, anyone that comes to you with a concern with a solution is a “friend”, and you need to have as many friends as possible. Second, those who come to you with a complaint (harp, nag, spiteful argument, anger, etc) are #@*holes and they don’t deserve your time, energy, or resource… because they are not there to solve something, they are simply there to serve their own need to hurt others, display their jealousy or feelings of inadequacy, and they have nothing of value for either party. “You are not doing them any favors to listen to their complaints… you are reinforcing their need to bitch, moan, and complain… and, if you give them a solution it won’t stop their complaints, because they are not looking for a solution, they only want to wallow in their bitching”.

Now, I wrote the word “asshole” because it was truly the word my Father used.  More importantly, I wanted to bring to the readers’ attention the truth that is surging through their mind right now… my purpose is to draw forth complaints. My goal is to provoke you, the reader, into complaining. I believe that as people read this blog post they are going to be very upset with my use of the word “asshole” (Its not as if we are not all adults. Its not as if this word is not used every day across the land to describe people we dislike). My purpose is to provoke people to complain. I realize that there will be those who will be indignant, offended, and feel dishonored by my use of the word asshole, and they will let me know their complaint. Others, who are too cowardly to share their indignation about my use of the word “asshole” will not say a word, but they will harbor discontent toward me.  Which person are you?

Those who contact me with a complaint about my use of the word asshole will be asked the following question, “I assume that you have lived your entire life without uttering a single foul word… so, how long has it been since the last time you used an inappropriate word, such as “asshole”?” My point I am trying to make is to show the hypocrisy of those who complain; those who lodge complaints only do so because they are coming from a position of “being perfect”, without fault, superior to others, and therefore they have the platform, right, and status to state their disdain, discomfort, and display their perturbed status in the form of a complaint. Jesus said, “take the forest out of your own eye before being concerned with the speck in someone else’s….” Why? Why did Jesus have to teach this principle? Because people are retarded, selfish, self-centered, and apt to get all bent out of shape and point a disdainful finger at others for doing the exact same thing they personally have done many times over. The hypocrisy and absurdity is outrageous.

The truth is that McDonalds, Ford Motor Company, Microsoft, Google, and President Obama all get complaints… every day they receive hundreds of thousands of complaints.  Therefore, because these organizations and people receive hundreds of thousands of complaints they will soon meet their demise, close up shop, shut their doors, and become complete and absolute failures!  For a business you are going to either make money, or lose money… you don’t really know.  The only thing you know for certain in the business world is that the sun will come up, it will go down, and you will receive lots and lots of complaints (most of the are unjust, unrighteous, and undeserved).  To step out in leadership, or to start a business that provides services or products to the public, or to take a government position anywhere the only constant and consistent thing you will receive is complaints.

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Complaints Against Craig Rogers | Love Your Enemies

Posted on April 25, 2011 by Craig Rogers

swearing in cartoon

Complaints Against Craig Rogers – Love Your Enemies

Complaints against Craig Rogers (me) is as normal as breathing, eating, and sleeping.  Complaints are totally and completely normal.  Just this morning I was standing in line at McDonald’s and I felt that the process of ordering my breakfast was taking too long.  I lodged a complaint.  I felt justified, “don’t they know that I am Craig Rogers?”.  I had a busy day ahead of me and the ordering process was uncessarily long, and the counter people at McDonald’s were in slow motion, potentially ruining my day, causing me great stress.  How ridiculous is it that I would complain when the total time it took to order, get my food, and begin eating was less than 5 minutes?  What the heck, am I entitled or what… who the heck is Craig Rogers anyway?” The point is that over the years I have received hundreds of thousands of complaints.  Starting with my parents and siblings, my elementary school teachers, the nuns and the Catholic Priests, I have had a life time of complaints… As the co-founder and CEO of Abundant Life Academy, a Christian boarding school for troubled teens, I have received zillions of complaints (just this week)…. and I don’t see the complaints stopping any time soon.  As long as I am alive and kicking, there will be complaints.  What’s worse, after I die the complaints will keep coming… the only good news is that I won’t be here to hear them.

A former student has made many strong complaints against me, and I am very proud of him. When this former student enrolled into Abundant Life Academy he was unable to communicate on any level. Essentially, this former student was severely emotionally immature. Although he could talk, he refused to do school work, communicate with adults, or share his opinion unless you call foul language an opinion. He refused to take care of his basic needs (educationally) or act in a respectful manner toward staff (those who wished to see him grow and succeed). Today, this former student does choose to communicate and share his opinion (albeit at the level of a 10 year old – his words are foul words, hate speech, and anger). Although a great deal of his language is based vial and foul language, compared to where he was when he enrolled he has grown light years. If you conversed with this young man today you would not be impressed unless you knew where he started from. Unfortunately, several people are using this young man as a pawn to push their agenda. He is the type of young person who struggles to create his own intelligent thought, and can be used by unscrupulous and corrupt people only wish to advance their agenda. This young man has been used by Angela Smith and Heal-online.org to advance their cause. Angela Smith could careless about this young man.  She has never lifted a finger to do anything to help him.  She claims that he has been abused but has done nothing to help him recover or heal.  She has not suggested a good therapist, nor has she offered financial support for therapy to help him heal from his supposed wounds. Her only desire is to use this young man to advance her cause, PERIOD!  Otherwise, if she really cared about her actions would prove it.

 

So, many people complain about Steve Jobs and Apple, Bill Gates and Microsoft, President Obama and his administration.  These guys receive hundreds of thousands of complaints from around the world every single day!  They must be horrible people who are corrupt, evil, and they should be shut down.  The truth is that in regard to Abundant Life Academy and Craig Rogers, the young man referred to above did not fall prey to any incident of any kind.  What this young man has claimed never happened.  However, he has done more harm to himself than all other people in his life combined.  Moreover, Angela Smith of Heal-online.org has done more damage and harm to this young man than any other person besides himself.  The truth is that this young man has complained about everyone and everything that has ever attempted to hold him accountability, and now that he is an adult he has run out of excuses.  This young man, as an adult, will have to stop playing the victim or he won’t be able to live in society.  He won’t be able to keep a job, or to have viable meaningful relationships.  This young man will also have to learn that people like Angela Smith of Heal-online will only use him, will not deliver on her promises, and will leave him high and dry the second he is no longer serving her agenda.  These are my opinions but so far my opinions are turning out to be true, and I suspect that if given time they will become facts.

Now, having said all of that the only thing that is important is that I am to love this former student as well as Angela Smith.  I am to give them my heart, in humble prayer, and humble service, expecting nothing in return.  My commitment is to bring together a scholarship for students of Abundant Life Academy in this young mans honor.  A substantial scholarship will be awarded to a girl and a boy student each year in honor this young man.  When parents contact Abundant Life Academy many can’t afford therapeutic boarding school tuition.  We are extremely creative and we always have some pro bono students on campus based on need.  I will make an official designation of an annual scholarship named the The Second Chance  Scholarship in honor of of this young man. Moreover, I pledge to pay $1,500 scholarship (per semester) to this young man if an when he decides to go to college or trade school.  Instead of exploiting this young man, and instead of using him to advance my agenda, I will give a gift that will last his life time.  Angela Smith, where is your heart on this matter?  Are you willing to match me dollar for dollar?  Love your enemies.

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Jesus – Lord of the Breakthrough | Troubled Teens and Making Heart Changes

Posted on April 18, 2011 by Craig Rogers

Ary Scheffer: The Temptation of Christ, 1854

Jesus Christ is the Lord of the Breakthrough Jesus – Lord of the Breakthrough | Troubled Teens and Making Heart Changes

The Bible states that Jesus is the Lord of the Breakthrough, which is exactly what the troubled teens of this country are looking for… Abundant Life Academy is the place where the “breakthrough” is taught, sought, and counted on, and we state, “Jesus is the only answer!”  The only way to restore the heart of a troubled teens is lead them to the truth, lead them to the finished work of Jesus Christ.  A breakthrough for troubled teens is the overcoming of an obstacle, a hinderance, or a blockage.  A breakthrough supposes depression, oppression, or suppression.  A break in general is the process of being set free… to break free… The truth is that all of us have come to this point in time having some serious issues “of the mind and heart“. More importantly, most all of us have been dealing with these things most of our lives.  These issues of the flesh are in the form of wounds, bad habits, faulty paradigms, irrational beliefs… and Lies the we believe!

Most of us have begged God to remove the continuous pit that we fall into directly related to these issues of the flesh. We certainly do not want the pain, anguish, darkness, or despair associated with our “decaying flesh filed with maggots” (death to relationships, lost opportunities, episodes of shrinking back into the shadows, playing the victim instead of tasting triumph). We even know EXACTLY what are issues are, and we stopped pretending that we were oblivious long ago. God wants to remove them from your life once and for all! He is ready and prepared to open heaven and heal you today! What is preventing this cleansing, healing, and freedom? Comfort, convenience, laziness, entitlement and its all wrapped up in “lack of faith, fear, and doubt” (convenience).

The truth is that God is perfect, and at minimum he wants a ten for one sale (10 for 1). He wants to set you free, heal your heart, restore your land/wealth/mind AND then use you as the example, a shunning light on top of the hill, the salt of the earth, the example, the living testimony showing/proving/demonstrating His sovereignty of GRACE. He is knocking on the door asking to come in and give you the freed and liberty that you have striven for all of your life, unlocking your purpose, His anointing flow from your every act of pure love. He has come to dwell within you in a constant state of nourishment, dining at His feast table forever!

Do you know why God is the God of the breakthrough? Do you know why He has promised to go before you, breaking through all the hinders and oppresses? Simply because He took the form of a man, a selfless act of pure love, took our sins upon Himself… As a man He knows what we are going through, and as a man of Grace, Holy, and Obedient He broke through for us as our example. He said, “follow me… I will never leave you or forsake you!” He said, “take up your cross, die daily, and have eternal life at my right hand seated on the throne with me and my Father -by grace alone!”

The point is that if we allow God to heal our hearts (laying down convenience, ending our addictions [pornography, over eating, material indulgences] give up emotionalism [yelling and screaming, bitching and complaining], let go of the need to be recognized, throwing down the ugliness of acceptance, denying pride/arrogance of title and positions, and coming to the end of self absorbency [claiming victim hood] God will use this miracle to heal and restore troubled teens and families.

The truth is that we are in a love affair with the sins of our flesh. We have one bride, Jesus… But our hearts are toward the seductarist, our mistress and secret lover. The truth is that in our hearts and in this physical world we are fat, sickly, and suffering from illnesses directly related to our fleshly appetites. We are good fallers, but pitiful doers. We have been called to be doers of the word! We have been called to be conformed to the image of Christ! To have the mind of Christ and one spirit with Him!

Wake up before it is too late! We have all been brought from near and from far to a God forsaken land of oppression and hate (Mormonism). We are in the day of the cover up, hiding our sins from one another, pretending that we are not naked! The Mormon culture is fraudulent, it’s a place where the believer is taught to hide their sons, confess nothing, count on ceremonies and temple traditions (anything but grace and mercy). Why has God gathered us here, calling us from the north, the south, the west, and the east? Why here in the desert? Why has he allowed us to become poor, tired, and hungry?

It’s because as He works in us, healing life long issues of the heart, restoring our vitality and exuberance for life, filled with grace, charity, and great mercy… Then, and only then are we truly prepared to be His physicians, His counselors, His ministers, His life coaches (pastors). When we are filled with grace, made Holy, given gifts, and in one mind and spirit with Him we will effect lives of teens and families.

Are you tired of doing the work of God apart from His resources, without His power, and lacking His authority? Are you totally exhausted? Are you satisfied with being overweight and sickly, had porn brought you delight, has judgement/criticism/complaint brought forth joy? Is darkness and despair nipping constantly at your feet? Has materialism, money, or wealth ever delivered it’s promise?

Jesus is the Lord of the breakthrough. He wants to breakthrough and heal you and your land. He wants to use the miracle of His grace in you as a living testimony to draw the lost teens to his heart filling them with dreams, visions, hope, faith, and love. He has called you to be His ambassador of the word of reconciliation.

Do you want to give up the heart ache, give up the despair, give up the lack, give up the health problems, give up being over weight, give up the addictions, give up the counterfiet? Then become DISCIPLES of Christ! It means to become the “disciplined ones”. It means to soak in Hia word, it means to take care of the temple He gave you. It means to love your spouse as yourself. It means to die daily, to crucify the flesh. Then you will be instruments of faith in His hands. Then you will see His presence (His wisdom, His knowledge, His power) heal the children He sends!

Now, read the Scripture below! And declare, “Jesus is the Lord of my breakthrough and He has prepared me to be healed this day!”

I will go before you and will level the mountains; I wll break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord…who summons you by name. (Isa. 45: 2-3)

May God be blessed and honored in all we do

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Therapeutic Boarding Schools Review, Investigations, and Reform

Posted on April 15, 2011 by Craig Rogers

KFC Drive thru sign

Therapeutic Boarding Schools Reviews – Investigations and Reform by Craig Rogers of Abundant Life Academy of Kanab, Utah

Every day, throughout the United States there are continuous reviews, investigations, and reforms (advancement, improvement, innovation, and progression) taking place within the walls of private Therapeutic Boarding Schools (Reviews of Therapeutic Boarding Schools). This is a continuous process of advancement, improvement, and progress…. hence the term “private”. These “private” schools and therapeutic programs are legal entities which are incorporated, licensed by local and State governmental agencies, and regulated by local and State licensing agencies within the government. More importantly, based on the premise that they are “private” schools their main source of income is coming directly from clients. Trust me on this…. unless these therapeutic schools and programs were delivering incredible services of great value there would be no clients to serve. The day that the quality of McDonald’s, Kentucky Fried Chicken, or Taco Bell declines is the day they begin to shut down their stores nationwide. People do not pay great sums of money to private therapeutic boarding schools unless these schools provide outstanding and substantial academic, clinical, and emotional growth services.

Abundant LIfe Academy Responsibility

Let’s look at public schools for a second. Do private citizens have a voice, or a say, in regard to the quality of services provided by the local high school? Absolutely not! However, does a parent who is paying for a private education and therapeutic services have a voice? Do they have a say in the education of their child? Do they get a vote? Is their opinion important? Absolutely! It is totally ridiculous to compare a private therapeutic boarding school to a public school. First, there is no comparison to the quality of services (academic and clinical). Second, the amount of personal attention, professional attention, and unique services are much greater in a private school. Lastly, does anyone know where the most dangerous setting all teenagers and parents should be greatly concerned about? Public schools! The greatest amount of crime, drug use, violence, and other nasty injurious situations are found in public high schools across the nation. Does anyone know where the safest place a teenager can be? In private boarding schools… especially the therapeutic boarding schools where student safety is the number one priority.

Now, the government (many levels and various agencies) are connected with the oversight and regulation of public schools. The State, Federal, and local governments are directly involved in all public schools. Then you have the school board, which are elected quasi-governmental agencies. Local law enforcement, Child Protection Services, and Department of Human Services are all directly involved in the public school systems. So, you would think that all these governmental people who are regulating and overseeing the safety of the students in public schools would create a safe place for students. Yet students at public schools are hurt, molested, assaulted, raped, introduced to drugs, and abused (emotionally, physically, and sexually) by adults, employees, staff, and peers at alarming rate. Public schools are not safe, period. Except for a handful of isolated incidents you don’t see any of these types of safety issues at private therapeutic boarding schools. The truth is the truth, and facts are facts. If you were to believe the liars from CAFETY, Heal-Online, ISAC, or Fornit Wayward Web Fora (Angela Smith, Ginger Warbis) you would think that the private schools and programs were right out of the pit of hell, and that government regulation is the solution to increased student safety. Are you kidding me?

There is truth that can’t be manipulated, dismissed, covered up, or ignored even by the intolerance of liberals. The truth is that he curriculum found at the private therapeutic boarding schools (programming, training, and clinical therapy – otherwise referred to as “boarding schools for troubled teens”) is the most advanced curriculum available. Especially when you compare the curriculum (experiential leadership and emotional growth curriculum combined with powerful therapeutic interventions) found at the private therapeutic boarding schools to the leadership/management curriculum from fortune 500 companies (provided to the Executive Managers and Corporate leaders) you would be totally amazed. The truth is that the training and equipping that “troubled teens” receive is the envy of CEO’s and the Executive management of our nations best corporate behemoth’s. Today’s therapeutic programs and camps are hailed as the most powerful and effective presentations of “emotional intelligence”, “effectual human behavior”, and “leadership training” available any where in the world. Meaning, the private academic-based therapeutic boarding schools are training up incredible leaders who are learning to master effective communication, intrinsic motivation, emotional literacy, the practice of optimism, essential elements of genuine empathy, and the freedom of personal “unique” expression with the duty to protect and advocate for the liberties of others. In today’s therapeutic boarding schools you will find the most advanced applications navigating emotions, consequential thinking, delayed gratification, and noble pursuits (care, trust, and serve). Troubled teens are learning and developing the skills of responsibility and the skills of accountability through experiential leadership training. In essence, troubled teens are finding the freedom and liberty through an extraordinary means known as EQ (emotional intelligence: know yourself, choose yourself, and give yourself). For idiots from CAFETY, Heal-online, ISAC, and Fornits Wayward Web Fora to claim that teens enrolled into therapeutic boarding schools are being abused, tortured, or damaged is ridiculous, not true, and total fabrications.

To today’s therapeutic boarding schools the troubled teens really are not “troubled”. They are frustrated, disillusioned, and disappointed ill-equipped leaders who do not trust the adult culture (mainly because the extreme liberalism of the far left has committed a horrific assault of fraud on the freedoms and liberties through intolerance, hate, oppression, and emotional violence/rape). “Liberalism is a lie”, offering only a counterfeit of true liberty, and a maggot infested decay of false freedoms. Today’s youth are irritated, angered, and they are beginning to see through the false vail of fraud committed against them by a culture of entitled elite. Young people have experienced the deceptive falsehoods of promises herald by the liberal leftist who live in a fantasy world of entitlement. (young people are beginning to wake up… They see there is no difference between Castro, Quaddahi, and the crazy bastard who is destroying Venezuela).  Young people are smart! They are rejecting the so-called establishment (liberal intolerance handing out drugs, sex, and false religion as if it were candy) because they can see the obvious manipulating and addiction to entitlement.

President Obama claims that the Tea Party wants to kill old people, hurt women, and throw poor children out on the street. The young people are not buying it! They can see that their own President blatantly lies, using fear to manipulate the masses through falsehoods. The “troubled teens” are sickened.  Can you imagine watching a 16 year old watch President Obama lie to the nation, hearing a statement like “He is just like me, when I was younger. Lying and manipulating my parents, acting like a victim, exaggerating the issues like a victim so that I can fool them through guilt, shame, and anger…. but he’s the President of the United States!”

In today’s Therapeutic Boarding Schools the troubled teens are learning that they have freedom and liberty through the exercise of responsibility and being accountable to one another. They are learning that true freedom comes only through personal restraint, discipline and hard work, and a deep conviction to care and serve one another. These young people look back at the 60′s, 70′s, and 80′s and ask the question, “were my grandparents and parents retarded?” Good question which deserves an answer!

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Teaching Troubled Teens to Communicate Emotionally | Silence of the Lambs Pt 3

Posted on March 27, 2011 by Craig Rogers

swearing in cartoon

Teaching Troubled Teens to Communicate Emotionally | Silence of the Lambs Pt 3, by Craig Rogers, co-founder of Abundant Life Academy, a Christian boarding school for troubled teens who are really strong leaders of power, potential, and great worth.

Some think that troubled teens are simply lazy and don’t put forth the effort to develop their communication skills. Perhaps that is true, and if so then I say, “what a waste!”. If this is true then hey are stuck and silenced. Some say the the only meaningful word of conviction from a troubled teen is a foul word of disrespect, such as the “F-word”. If that is true then troubled teens who’s best asset regarding his/her communication skills is the use of foul language does not realize how stupid they sound. Yes, “Stupid”. The troubled teen that present themselves through foul language of disrespect act as though they are retarded. What I mean to say is that they are emotionally retarded, or emotionally unable to communicate, therefore their only means of strong conviction would be the use of foul language (aggressive language of disgrace and disdain). However, having said that, those professionals who serve troubled teens need to learn to decipher and to translate these foul words into effective words, thus teaching the troubled teen a new language, a language of expression, hope, and empowerment.

These same troubled teens we are talking about above seem to be were to hard work and effort. To learn a new language, to learn to communicate one’s emotions effectively (getting your emotional needs met) is hard work. Unfortunately, some troubled teens, the one’s who seem to be allergic to hard work and effort, never develop the skills of responsibility or accountability. Therefore, they don’t learn the discipline of “trust”, “respect”, “submission to authority”, or “forgiveness” and therefore they never learn to communicate from their heart (cannot empathized and therefore can’t communicate with others at an emotional level). They are deaf, dumb, and unable to convey a personal thought or feeling (emotion) unless it is mired in blame, justification, and victim hood. At that point no one is listening, and their voice, their message to the world, their inner most personal life expression is paralyzed and oppressed into obscurity, silenced and overlooked. Unfortunately the very purpose and reason for the troubled teens existence is silenced and never amounts to any meaningful experience.

The silent hurting lambs (troubled teens) are actually very vocal, but they’re words and their message are not heard. They sound so unintelligible, like spoiled rotten babies, stammering, throwing around f-bombs as if they were pieces of hard candy. These silent lambs stammering about as if they were in a fog, funk, or stupor. There is a sense of terror in their cause as they strike out and rail against those who have stood by them, supporting them, teaching and directing them out of the abyss and back toward the fulfillment of their message. After awhile their only communication is hate, anger, and judgment. You can cut their sense of frustration and personal disappointment with a knife. The sense of loss and regret these kids have is thick, and gooey, and icky, like puss that oozes out of an infected sore. The goal is to teach them a new language, to have new awareness (emotional), new practices, and new experiences. To set them free and to help them to experience fullness you have to help them to communicate their inner most express (purpose, their heart, and their hurt).

At the point of frustration things get worse, because no one is listening anymore, and the troubled teens begin to act out their frustration and disappointment. Who wants to listen to another misguided ignorant whiney complaining teen? You know the one’s I’m referring to, the teens that use foul and vulgar language, spewing venom on authority and those who have attempted to pull them out of their own demise. They are their only and own worst enemy. I guess the only people who are sympathetic to the “silence of the lambs” are other silent sheep. But even they are not “hearing”. Everyone else of importance has departed, tired of the same old nasty blame game, having no more tolerance for the “victim-stance”. The only people left to listen to the deafening silence of the troubled teen are those who love the stray hairless homeless dog who is starving and pathetic looking, diseased, and unlovable by most. There are not enough of these “saints” to meet all the needs of the “silent lambs”.

You can spot the troubled teen who is not heard, because they are the one’s who strike out with hateful speech, anger, and contempt for those who are heard. These troubled ones, they are those who are obviously unable to express their inner most heart, they feel discarded and dismissed by the masses, devalued and disconnected by those closest to them. What is the answer to their horrid dilemma? Jesus in the only answer! In this case, Jesus is empathy, understanding, patience, perseverance, long suffering… and love. Only the redeeming love of Christ can set us free from the selfish and self-centered trap of oppression. Therefore, stop listening to the clanging noise, look past the hurtful words, and begin to see the hurting person who is thrashing about. Take the insults and the slurs, stick with them long enough so they know you are trustworthy. Listen to what they are not saying and translate the rest. Listening, building trust, and then coach them on how to be heard, helping them to develop communication skills. Its called emotional intelligence. All of a sudden the troubled teen is no longer troubled. Replacing the foul hate speech with empathy, sensitivity, and patience. The transformation is a rush, setting free the silent lambs to become roaring lions, full of power, grace, and strength.

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Teenagers of Hope are Heard | Silence of the Lambs Pt 2

Posted on March 27, 2011 by Craig Rogers

Descripción da foto

Teenagers of Hope are Heard – Silence of the Lambs Pt 2, by Craig Rogers, co-founder of Abundant Life Academy discussing the notion that teens of hope are teens that are heard.

Teenagers who report to being happy (content, hopeful, optimistic about their future) are the same teens who claim that they are generally “heard”, understood, and valued for their expressed message (personal message of their heart, where it be written, sung, or acted out on a stage).  Meaning, those who feel that others “hear” them (connect, respect, and share similarities) report that they also live empowered lives and believe they have something valid to contribute to the world around them.  In other words, these teenagers claim that their lives have hope have meaning, and their message has positively impacted the world around them.  They have a sense of fulfillment and a sense of being appreciated.  In short, these teens feel valued, counted, and respected.

To be human is to communicate (express) what’s in your heart.  We are all made with a unique, but important message of hope and destiny. Teenagers must find a way to express themselves, or they may experience the deep anguish of rejection, oppression, being trapped, and misunderstood (meaningless, unimportant, rejected).  Being rejected, abandoned, and discarded is the biggest fear one could have.  Those who find an effective way to share their heart with the world are the very teenagers who claim to have the greatest level of happiness (hope, contentment, fulfillment, empowerment, purpose, connectedness, etc.) and describe their lives as having substantial meaning and purpose.

For teenagers to have found a way to communicate the depth that is in their heart is to have found a way to empathize with others, to have found a way to effectively communicate inner most feelings (depth), and most importantly a way to be heard by many.  It draws a simple conclusion… if you want happiness you MUST be able to communicate, convey, converse, connect… and be heard.  More importantly, to be able to convey and communicate emotions, to be emotionally literate, to be able to navigate emotions through words, and to describe empathy, and to know how to articulate fear (fear of rejection, abandonment, being a disappointment) is to be emotionally intelligent (EQ).  Are we teaching teens to speak up, to speak out, or are we teaching them to shut up, and to shutdown?  In reality, we are teaching them to perform, but not from the heart, but from expectations (parents, teachers, coaches, society).  So when they create a sub-culture made up of other teens they create a language and a culture all to their own.  It is there that they speak up, and express themselves.  Unfortunately, all to often its the blind leading the blind.

The people who describe themselves as being “depressed”, “anxious”, “uncertain”, “unworthy”, “dismissed”, “disconnected”, and “lost” in anguish and despair are the very same people who claim that they are not heard, are not understood, and unable to convey their life experience or connect with others via empathy. Communication, and the ability to communicate emotions, is hard work and takes great effort; emotional literacy skills are developed over time through practice and discipline. Very few people get lucky and “stumble” upon effective ways to express themselves in meaningful ways.  It just is not something that is “lucky”, or “natural” for most people.  Its difficult and it takes effort, trial and error, and making a lot of mistakes along the way.  You need a Life Coach!

Some people do have the talents and gifts to convey and communicate in meaningful ways, nor do the find other platforms of communication, such as; music, writing, dance, athletics, or some other manner that allows the very most inner self to come out “on stage” to be seen and appreciated. But what about the others?  What happens to a person who never finds a way to be respected, received, or plugged in – unable to express their unique personage?  I can tell you this, “It’s not good!”

All to often, troubled teens are really just strong people of tremendous worth and potential who have not found a way to be “heard”. They therefore feel worthless, unable, stifled, dismissed, discarded, and unimportant. They are not able to feel connected, and don’t feel the sense of appreciation for their personal message, no sense of respect, and a complete failure to share their message with the world.  They once had a special revelation that was important, but didn’t come forth.  Perhaps covered up, dulled, or dumbed down due to failure to grow emotionally or intellectually (direct result of drug and alcohol abuse, or sexually promiscuity, or other forms of self-defeating behavior).

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Troubled Teens Not Being Heard | The Silence of the Lambs Pt 1

Posted on March 27, 2011 by Craig Rogers
The Silence of the Lambs

Troubled Teens Not Heard | The Silence of the Lambs by Craig Rogers, co-founder of Abundant Life Academy, a Christian boarding school for exceptional troubled teens.

The most predominant reason teens are “troubled” is that they are not being heard; they are the “Silence of the Lambs”.  They either do not know that they have a special message (gift, talent, extraordinary purpose), or they do know but are not able to present it (which makes them frustrated, and therefore they demonstrate the frustration through their “acting out” behavior). At Abundant Life Academy we believe that troubled teens are generally not able to convey their inner most self.  They are not able to express themselves in a way that gets vital needs met.  For example, when troubled teens are struggling emotionally they are not able to communicate, convey, or describe their inner conflict, therefore they do not resolve their issues, nor do they get the help they need. If they can’t communicate, they are not being heard.  Therefore, they lash out, act out, and then the focus shifts to their overt behavior, deflecting from the real issue, therefore everyone overlooks the real reason WHY they are acting out.  Unfortunately, this becomes a pattern and they tend to act out even more, and become doubly silenced.

The obvious behaviors that lead teenagers to be labeled as “troubled teens” is a direct result of not being heard, and/or not being able to express themselves. Troubled teens are kids who are able to rationalize well, but not able to redirect, not able to decipher, and not able to interpret the dynamic nature of their “trouble”.  They are silenced, even though they are usually speaking volumes.  Most of the time the silence is self-induced, but it does not matter.  Anyone who has ever experienced the place in life where you are discounted, dismissed, made to feel unimportant, overlooked, unnecessary, considered to be a bother without worth – knows what it is to not be heard.  To be a silenced lamb is to be without merit, without worth, or without importance… without a voice to be considered.  No value, no input, no contribution, no power, no direction, and no choice.

Abundant Life Academy  Receives Community Award

We have all been given an inherent and deeply personal and important message to share with the world.  We are driven to get this message out, even when we have no idea that there is a message, there is a deep calling and we know that it must be shared, heard, valued, and our contribution counts.  Intuitively we just know that there is some importance to our life, and that we matter, and our part will cause many good and great things to transpire.  To be disallowed and dismissed is not an option.  But sooner or later if we are not heard we tend to give up.  There are millions of “troubled teens” in the United States that were born into this world to contribute something very special, and they need to be heard, to be counted, and to be understood for their unique message and powerful contribution.

We all have been wired to speaking up, speaking out, and share what is filled up in our heart.  Whether our heart is filled with light, hope, inspiration, faith, or love, we are all driven to express what is in our hearts.  Even if our heart is filled with darkness, hurt, guilt, shame, or ugly vial, we will find a way to pour out what is filling our hearts.  Troubled Teens are like silent lambs, meaning they cry out and stammer, but no one cares, no one listens, and everyone wishes that they would simply shut up, and go away.  Consequentially their needs are not met, because no one knows cares. Because they are considered to be a big pain, pain that is better ignored, dismissed, and therefore no matter how loud they may get, they are silent.

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Cyber Bullies – Cowards of Facebook – Hate Speech of Intolerance

Posted on March 9, 2011 by Craig Rogers

Image representing Facebook as depicted in Cru...

The Cyber Bully phenomenon, is a modern day manifestation of an old issue (hate speech of intolerance) referred to as “cowards” who are also known as cyber bullies. Cyber bullies are behind the mask of Facebook, truly cowards who spew hate through speech and show extreme intolerance behind the Facebook disguise. These Facebook cowards are hate speech mongers, shouting the ugliness of intolerance.  These are cowards who normally would never speak up, speak out, or stand on their own to voice. But as they cower behind Facebook their opinions (venom of hurt, pain, and self-hatred) get posted in an anonymous manner.  Hidden, like a coward, they will attack like vicious dogs.  As long as they are not pulled out into the open, forced to stand up for themselves, forced to articulate in an intelligent way, they will be anonymous cowards who hang out in the shadows, hurling insults from the crowd, in the safety of anonymity. It is so bizarre that these same people would never have the guts or courage to share their strong opinions face-to-face. Harsh strong language from an obscure place behind the cyber walls of Facebook.

First, this is not knew. This kind of mob rule and open ugliness has been around as long as we have historical records of any kind. The coward hides, pounces only when he is safely behind the fence. But when the fence is removed, the harshness and boldness disappears. In its place are excuses, rationalizations, and cowering of embarrassment. Nothing new… Facebook has been reported as being the wall of ignorance, intolerance, and hate speech by the only group that would otherwise hide in the shadows. The cowards finally have a place to speak in cyber space.

The facts are beginning to mount.  Employers are now checking out prospective employees.  Those who are found to be cyber bullies are not getting the second interviews.  They are left out cold.  People are being frozen out of social venues, dating web services, housing opportunities, and many other opportunities in life because they “show up” as total idiots on Facebook.  Using foul language, attacking others, spewing hate, being hateful and full of revenge… There are stupid people who are looking for jobs, getting interviews, and then are denied employment because the prospective employee has trashed previous employers.  There is a new wave of cyber detectives.  People are showing up as being ugly toward former spouses/boyfriend/girlfriend and in doing so show their “other side” or “true colors”.  Millions of people are searching Social Media in order to find out “who you really are”.  People are mistaken by the mere appearance of anonymity of the Facebooks, Twitters, and Youtube.  It is no anonymous.  As a matter of fact what people write on Facebook is being used against them in divorce court, determining who gets the kids, and it is also being used in the determination of home loans (SBA), and other important privileges of life.

Sad, but the bold cyber haters are looking pretty stupid as they cut themselves out of opportunities, jobs, relationships, and other important venues of life.  These ugly statements are coming back to bite them in the butt, literally.  The Cyber Trash talk is literally coming back upon them as they lose dignity, respect, and value in society.  Unfortunately, most of the cyber cowards won’t ever find anything but victimhood, as they continuously undermine their own efforts to enjoy the life.

Facebook bullying students ‘should be expelled’
Teachers have called for the expulsion of pupils who insult staff on internet sites such as Facebook and Bebo after a popular girls’ school became embroiled in a cyberbullying row.

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=22006040502

http://www.wiredprnews.com/2010/10/18/facebook-seeks-to-remove-hateful-content-from-site_2010101814437.html

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/facebook/4214234/Facebook-bullying-students-should-be-expelled.html

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