Troubled Teens: Speaking in a way that works

Troubled Teens: Speaking in a way that works

Craig & Wendy Rogers, co-founders of Abundant Life Academy, a Christian boarding school for troubled teens, write on many topics related to helping parents of troubled teens.  Craig & Wendy Rogers share their articles and links on Facebook on A Truth About Abundant Life Academy.  Please visit us there for more of the articles presented to encourage, minister, and bring forth hope.

The Bible is the most incredible source of valuable information that has ever been captured on paper.  Individual words lined up in certain order that brings for meaning, significance, and power to that has saved the lives of billions.   Pretty powerful.  And, that same Bible has been used to attack people, degrade them, and to defile both man and God.  The weird thing is that when people use the Bible to condemn others, to judge others, to damn others, or to attack someone’s character it is ALWAYS a self-confession of the sin that they themselves are committing.  Isn’t that interesting.  So, in other words, when Bible thumpers force their understanding on others it is a form of intolerance.  When it used to condemn others, it is a form of self-confession.  The person using Scripture to condemn another is really exposing their own sin, the sin that they are accusing others of committing.

For example, the Bible clearly states a powerful truth by using an analogy of a spec in someone’s eye.  The word states that there is a spec in the eye of the one being accused, when there is actually a large piece of lumber in the eye of the accuser. The word refers to the fact that the accuser is trying to remove a spec out of the eye of the accused; all the while the accuser has a timber in his/her own eye.  This scripture really says many things, as it is powerful and broad.  But it also has a very simple message.  Being a hypocrite is not attractive; as a matter of fact hypocrites look ridiculous, shallow, and small. So, the picture the analogy portrays is very interesting.  One person who is sinful is calling out another person who is sinful.  Ummm.  I wonder why?  The Bible even answers that question.  People who use Scripture to point out the sin of others is committing the same sin by using Scripture.  It is a paradox, and Scripture was never intended to bring shame, but to bring hope.  What about using Romans chapter 8 (there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus).  What about using Ephesians chapter 2 (you were made alive in Christ even when you were dead in your transgressions.  You are His masterpiece, and your salvation is not based on works, and there is absolutely no reference “performance”)?  There are hundreds of Scriptures that define sin as judgment, or the sinful (we all fall short, we have all sinned, and we all have fallen short) pointing out the sin of others.  It is pure hypocrisy.  Furthermore, we are instructed to love our enemies, and to carry their burden, and forgive or you won’t be forgiven.

Well, lets revisit the notion that I mentioned before.  Those who are sinful are more than likely to see their own sin in the actions and behaviors of others.  It is a phenomenon that is totally normal.  We all do it to some degree.  For example, we may get angry with people who blow us off, and restrict our desire to communicate by failing to return our calls or emails.  Those who get angry are the same people who fail to return calls and emails of others.  They may say, “gosh this person is a pain in the neck!” as they watch a call go unanswered and lands in voicemail.  It is called transference.  When we blow off someone who wants to communicate with us we know exactly how we feel when we blow them off.  So, when someone does it to us we transfer our feelings and assume that the other party is disrespectful therefore we get mad. In reality the reason for the unreturned communication could be caused by many legitimate reasons that have nothing to do with disrespect.

The point is that those who point out the faults of others and fail to include themselves as one who also sins is casting judgment.  We are called to correct one another, but only because we realize that we too suffer from the same weakness.  Its not about calling another out in their sin, its all about being grateful for the grace of God because we were saved even though we were sinful in everyway.  Be thankful for the grace and give mercy to those who are struggling, as Jesus gave you mercy and poured out grace upon all of us.

So, I am only able to write this truth because I am a hypocrite, and I am a sinner, saved by grace.  I am only able to write this because I have tried to take the spec out of another’s eye while having a whole forest in my own eye.  And I did that yesterday!  This sinful nature is described in Romans 7, and Paul says, who will save me from this sinful state… and the answer is Jesus.  So, use Scripture to condemn me and point out my sin.  But I will beat you to the punch and humbly admit that I am a child of God despite all that I do.  I am utterly sinful, and I cherish the charity of God in the grace afforded me when I deserved condemnation and death.  There I go by the grace of God and I hate my sin, and as I see the sin of others it brings forth compassion, empathy, and a sense to forgive.

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